I Can’t Date A Little Bitch

Woah…That came off strong. Maybe even a little mean but it is so true!

Through my life I’ve dated different types of people. The asshole, the one who was “perfect” for me, the rebound, etc…but I swear to G, the one that annoyed me the most was the lil b.

Now, I don’t know if it’s because I’m an Aries and the majority of us have type A leadership personalities but it’s almost as if — me knowing I can run you over and push you to your limits encourages me to do just that. PUSH PUSH PUSH till either you can’t take it anymore or I feel horrible and break up with you because I stepped all over you like a little puppy. It’s probably not one of my proudest traits but it does leave me to wonder — does the perfect balance between alpha and beta relationships exist?

As many of you know I have dated both men and women. When I dated just women there was always a confusing dynamic for me in my relationships because as nature calls there is always an alpha and a beta in  every relationships. With straight couples, normally the dude takes the leadership role and the woman, the more submissive role. When I dated women there always seemed to be this unclear agreement where neither of us knew which role to take. Should I open doors? Should I pay? Am I the big spoon because I’m tall even though I like being little spoon? Do I give head first? Lmao, you know typical lesbian questions. As I’ve grown older and learned what I like and don’t like on a female partner I’ve also learned more about what “my role” is in a same sex relationship. I am ok with paying, I am ok with being a provider, killing the spiders, basically taking the leadership role. This doesn’t make me more masculine because I still enjoy dressing up, wearing heels, etc. It just means I’ve found my comfort zone as a partner.

Now, when it comes to heterosexual relationships — it’s a whole other story. I first started dating dudes three years ago. So because I come from a different kind of relationship dynamic this has shown some trouble. Don’t get me wrong — I love being taken care of, taken out, spoiled and all the cute things that involve a relationship but when it comes to all the not cute things — I’ll be the first to say “alright then if you don’t want to be with me then leave.” I have created a wall of comfort in which I know I am self sufficient and will not tear down the walls to beg anyone to do anything for me.

I can spoil myself, finance myself, take care of myself and basically do everything by myself but the raw, honest truth is that I don’t want to. In my mind I have created this idea in which I have a partner who treats me as an equal but still takes the leadership role. A person who is ready to be proactive in times of emergency or simply willing to be the backbone of our home. In no way am I saying I am looking for someone to fully take care of all responsibilities but simply someone who willingly takes the role of leadership.

So where does that leave a person like me? Does the ideal relationship with two alphas exist? Are beta men attracted to me because of my willingness to lead? Am I too alpha for all alpha males? Should I change my behavior to suit someone else’s needs?


Let’s talk! I’ll post a picture on Instagram to discuss the topic. Come give me your thoughts.



Stacey D.

One Reply to “I Can’t Date A Little Bitch”

  1. From reading your entry, you are a woman in her masculine. It has nothing to do with what type of relationship you are in your masculine state. Can you be masculine and still want to feel sexy and pretty? Yes. Being masculine or feminine has nothing to do with the surface, it’s the person inside. You are a leader, you are self sustaining and goal oriented. I am assuming you are successful in mostly everything you do and have ambition to go even further.

    It’s a double edge sword for you, on one hand you in your natural state are masculine. Therefor in order to have a successful relationship you need someone in their feminine, the problem is when it comes to men, it’s very unattractive. This isn’t just for you it’s for almost every woman. Nothing comes off more vile than a man who is needy or insecure. I feel your best chance long term is finding a woman completely in her feminine, however, you WILL have to be the backbone in the relationship. Best of luck girl! 🙂


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